For this article I used the descriptions of women who have shared their online dating experiences with me to describe 11 types of (heterosexual) men who are drawn to Internet dating. I realize, as do you, that there are infinite varieties of men who engage in online dating for infinite reasons. No many more types could be included on this list, and some men may fit into many categories. Still, in the world of online dating, some types seem more prevalent than others. Here is the collected consensus of 11 categories of men you might encounter when dating online:
With groups, at work, with your partner, with your family, and alone you might feel like you are different people. At times you may even feel like a fraud. Somehow you think you’re supposed to know more, be different, have some sort of tangible or social skill set that you’re not sure you actually possess in real life, so you put on what feels like a false self to convince yourself and others that you are the person you’re supposed to be, that you’re better than you really are. But the process feels uncomfortable, inauthentic, and unreal. Here are 3 reasons to embrace what can sometimes feel like your false self:
When the pain is at its worst, can you imagine being able to make a clean break from everything and everyone that reminds you of your ex? With modern technology, the incredible amount of access you have to your ex makes a clean break nearly impossible. Figuring out how to sever the ties with your ex, and just how many obscure connections there are is utterly mind-blowing.
It’s both noble and self-sacrificing to stay in a relationship because leaving would crush your partner. You’re loyal to the core, but also profoundly dissatisfied. Now your struggle is to balance the vow you made to your partner to stay in the relationship against the emotional drudgery and the desperate longing to be free.
If you’ve been miserable in your relationship for far too long, the logical thing to do is leave. But if there’s been trauma, betrayal, chaos in your life, you fear the unknown. Of course you do. Therefore, how can you leave an unhappy relationship when your distrust in the world compels you to stay put, regardless of of how unhappy you are in the relationship. And it seems like any alternative would be even worse.
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